Ronking round the world

Up at "sparrows fart" today, and on the rain-sodden road before we knew what hit us. The quote of the day goes to the random Dutch man in our hostel, who said "The rain that falls now, can't fall later" Quite, but I say that the rain that falls MUCH later, isn't falling now when I want to go Luging down a big bastard mountain! We drove through a variety of amazing scenery, culkminating in countless lush fern gullies, cosetted in blankets of morning mist, framed by dramatic treeless mountains. It was all quite beautiful! We stopped for lunch, then got driving again towards Rotorua, driving throught the Shire, and sadly past (not through) Mata Mata, where Hobbiton is. Shame!

Got some fantastic activities on today, including visiting a geothermal park, being introduced to Maori culture, luging down a mountain (weather permitting) and finally, a Maori concert and Hangi (feast where they pressure cook the food under the ground). It's going to be awesome!

Kia ora (Hello and welcome) from New Zealand! We had a nice early rise to get Bren and I to the pick up point on time, just as well we did, as there was an accident on the main road through the centre of Auckland, it took forever to get past it! We ended up arriving about half an hour early, went into a cafe and had a nice cup (bowl) of coffee to get us bright and alert for the meetin' and greetin'!

The Kiwi experience bus itself was rammed with people, though Bren and i did get a twin seat. Lurch (the driver) took us to mount Eden, where Dave had taken us before, but unfortunately it was absoultely covered with fog! Just as well we got to see it on a clear day, as I wouldn't have thought as highly of Auckland otherwise. the drive itself was really cool, with some excellent scenery made all the more dramatic by a blanket of mist. We stopped off at place called Cathedral cove and went on a nice scenic walk, marred only by slight rain and by me breaking a nail. Oh fooey!

Finally, after having bought a much needed drink, we drove from the beach to Whitianga, a beautiful piece of coastline framed by dramatic cliffs and stone outcroppings. Even more dramatic though, were the four guys who were standing on a sand bar iun the middle of the sea, it looked like they were walking on water!! This lead Paul and I to deduce that the plural of Jesus is Jice, and that a group of Jice is a flock. That was some flock of Jice over there!

The view from the front porch doors was so breathtaking it made it really quite difficult to watch the Simpsons! That, and the fact that Pippa's laugh is so loud that it actually took a few seconds for my ears to adjust after each eardrum bashing, making me miss a few of the jokes. Curses!!

After a nice fish and chips dinner, Paul, Pippa, Zeta, Bren and I all went out to "Smittys" the local bar. We had a great time, ending up with all of the Kiwi experience people joining us on our table. Centre of attention again! It was only marred by a cover band slaughtering classics by Coldplay, Daughter by Pearl Jam (Martin, you're SO pleased you didn't hear it!!) and various other barely recognisable affronts to nature.

The night ended up with a camera fight, in which Bren's camera, armed with ridiculous multiple-flash red eye reduction thing, easily defeated the other cameras, with a variety of brilliant "Oh christ, please don't blind me again" pictures to show for it. Got back at just after midnight for a 7AM start. Punishing!

Stayed up until three AM drinking home brew with Dave, and managed to wake up at 10, not too bad, given the 2 hours sleep the night before! Dave managed to fix the leaking water system, then took us around Auckland to see the sights,which were really quite beautiful. We went around the coast looking at the Americas cup Yachts, seeing amazing super yachts and bustling Marinas, then on to Mounts Eden and Wellington for some spectacular views of the city and across the water to the volcanoes in the distance. Breathtaking.



As an aside, Phil had a bit of a scare a few days back, when he returned from the Big day out (open air concert) in NZ to find his car had broken into. He and his mates looked the car up and down, and, to their shock, found a home made bomb under his car! Minutes later, the road was closed off and bomb squad members were in attendance to make it safe, which must have been really quite terrifying!

We got back, had a bit to eat and then went out with Phillip to watch him play mixed football(!) (the man's such a sports enthusiast, he makes Bren look like an indoors type of guy!) Rather brilliantly, two of their team members didn't show up, so Bren and I found ourselves taking part in a 20 minutes each way game of 7 a side. We actually managed to win 2-1, and I particularly enjoyed "tight marking" their left winger, what a babe! In fact, a number of their team were quite easy on the eye, maybe we'll play another game when we get back to Auckland...

Managed to book the Kiwi experience today, we're leaving from Central Auckland at 9:30 to go to a place called Whitiange, to dig thermal pools on the beach and to admire the lovely coastal scenery. Oh and to get drunk!

Sadly, the NZ dollar has had a bit of a rally of late, and it looks like the trip is going to cost us about 300 pounds extra over the month, which is a bit crappy really. Stupid exchange rates!

Greetings from magnificent New Zealand! Spent most of last night drinking beers, and watched american pie 3, which had some moments of perfect comedy genius resulting in uproarious laughter! Stayed up until 3AM watching One Night at McCools and talking to Ed and Georgie. Not the best idea when you have to be up at 5:30... Managed to wake up early, dragging myself and a rather comatose Bren to the airport in time for the plane and on to New Zealand with only "Second hand lions" for entertainment. That, and the 100 or so non English speaking Orientals who provided the flight attendants with quite the mountain to climb. My favourite moment was when the pilot announced "Do not turn on your mobile phones until you are clear of the aeroplane and into the departure lounge", which was immediately followed by the sound of a nokia being turned on.

I had managed to get in touch with some long standing family friends, the moons, who live in New Zealand who have rather brilliantly agreed to let us stay for a few days in Auckland! We met Jean Moon at the arrivals lounge and enjoyed a nice chat whilst being driven to Castle moon. Phillip arrived, quickly followed by dave, who insisted on "Watering" us with his home brewed beer which was really rather paletable! We ended up going to watch Phil play football at his local playing fields, winning one game 2-0, but losing the all important 1st vs 2nd place grudge match 3-1 owing to some truly awful goalkeeping.



We got back, had a rather lovely steak and snaggers BBQ and sat down to watch "hearts in Atlantis" which is still on at the moment. Dave has promised to take us fishing on his boat when we get back to Auckland at the end of our trip, which i'm really looking forward to! He's going to take us out on a tour of Auckland tomorrow (he runs a tour company here!) then Bren and I are going to book our Kiwi experience bus for the 30th. Can't wait!

Had a fairly quiet one in the end yesterday, as everyone at the flat is flat broke at the moment. Robin's ladyfriend Olivia came round and we all stayed in playing FIFA 2003 whilst drinking a few beers and finished up by watching Bugsy until 2AM. Failed to sort out Bren's overdraft nonsense with HSBC and also failed to book our Kiwi experience bus (time difference meant that the NZ office was closed! Still, we only need to call a day in advance so it'll be fine, and we'll get all the buses down to Queenstown booked in advance, taking us up to the halfway point and enabling us to have a bit of a breather for a few days! Hopefully we'll be able to meet up with Mike and Martin (from Fraser island) while we're there. Oh, and Chrissy is almost certain to be visiting us in London at some point, after missing us in Canberra by a matter of hours, which will be pretty cool.

Really am looking forward to New Zealand now, have been reading a book called "Magnificent New Zealand" which is really rather good, and features increasingly spectacular/ridiculous scenery throughout.

As far as the Australian open is concerned, absolutely everyone in the flat hates LLeyton Hewitt with more passion than could be considered healthy, so we were all absolutely overjoyed when he got (soundly) beaten by Roger Federer. Superb. 7 out of the 8 are now in the flat, with Georgie turning up this morning and promptly beginning the process of tidying up the eponymous "ladpad"(TM).

She would have loved the maggots...

Off to see the last Samurai in a few minutes, then back to coogee to go the the coogee bay Hotel with Bren and a few of his ex-workmates, then back to the flat for some cheap beer, conversational nonsense and computer games. Should be cool, next blog will be from New Zealand, which is pretty damn strange.

My eye infection's finally cleared up! Hooray! Also, I managed to almost dislocate my neck whilst sneezing this morning, which is nice. the tally of people staying in the two bedroom flat is rising to 8 tonight, which is going to make things a little cosy on the couch methinks. I may have to partake in some kind of "fight to the death" to decide who sleeps on something other than the floor. Still not as ludicrous as Emily and Charlene's accomodation, which has 13 people staying in it. And to think they even offered to let me crash round if i'd gone to the club with them!

Everyone looks SO much cooler in sunglasses.

Some interesting and slightly worrying news from the foreign office, who say "We advise against all non-essential travel to Indonesia" and conclude with "If you are already in Indonesia you should consider leaving if your presence is not essential". Sounds peachy.

Absolutely brilliant! By sheer fluke, Emily and Charlene (two girls I used to work with at the Coy Carp pub in Harefield) were already booked onto the Neighbours night! Started the day by giving back Jeff (somehow held back the tears...) and generally milling around Sydney, using cheap internet cafe's. Got back to the flat fairly late, around half 4, after finding out that the Neighbours night started at 6!! Showered, changed, had a few beers and watched a bit of Lock stock & two smoking barrels, before realising we were going to be horribly late! Got a cab in the end, costing 18 dollars and managed to get there with half an hour til curtain.

Met up with Em and Charl and their friends James and Laura, and proceeded to get drinking and wait for Dr Carl and Alf! When they finally did arrive, i've never heard a louder cheer and whoop before in my life, Alf and Dr Kennedy are legends, with most of the people in attendance being from the good old UK. Emily decided that she had a fever, so Dr Karl promptly put his hand on her brow, and said that he should take her home for some bed rest. Class!







Got photo's with Alf and Karl, Bren's makes him look like he's Karl Kennedy's son, it's so bizarre, i've never seen anyone smile quite so widely! Proceeded to get more drunk, with the bar first running out of Pint glasses, then schooner glasses, then Tooheys, then VB, and finally running out of Carlton cold. Don't reckon they'd banked on the thirst of the English!



Danced at the first hint of JT, and got my groove on in fantastically dirty style with the lovely Laura. Saucy! the rest of the night gets a bit hazy, but Em and Charlene went to a club and Bren and I met up with Alim and Robin, got on a bus and headed home, where I promptly cooked Bren and i a fry up at 1:30AM before losing consciousness and being photographed in various stupid sleeping poses. Class.

Off to watch some cricket now with a cooler full of beer, then on to the tiles again for a penultimate night Australia day finale that shouldn't be for the faint hearted. Bonzer.

Oh yes it's Neighbours night, and the feelin's right, oh yes it's Neighbours night, oh what a night...

Sydney through the eyes of a tourist! Finally the weather decided to play ball long enough for me to go to Circular quay and see the harbour bridge and opera house in all their sun-drenched glory! The bridge is simply awesome, as you can get right up close to it. Admittedly the golden gate bridge is bigger, but you don't get any idea of how amazing it is as you can only see it from miles away!



The opera house was really good too, until you got up close to it. It's best appreciated in postcards and photo's as it doesn't stand close scrutiny all that well!



bren and I spent the rest of the day running various errands, with limited success. We visited HSBC (closed) tried to change the destination on one of our tickets (incompetent employee stopped play) and tried to hand the car back (office was close. Oh, and it rained and we didn't want to get wet...) the best moment was Bren going to get his glasses bent back. We went to the opticians and, skillfully, he managed to bend the arm back into the right position and lined it up on Brens head. Success!! Suddenly, out of nowhere, he decided to try to straighten out the (already straigt) arm and SNAP. Only glue and Sellotape now protect Bren from an ocular sun caning. Jolly good show Mr Optician!!

We discovered also that we don't get any money back for handing it back a few days early (boo!) and that Bren's speeding fine, wait for it, is a cool 1250 dollars. It'll be about half that as companies get charged a larger amount than individuals, but still, the estimate is going to be around the 500 dollar mark, not cheap! We also discovered that had bren been Australian, he would have been banned one and a half times by now. And you thought I was bad!!

Highligh of the day was cooking and eating a HUGE fry up and sitting in front of the telly watching the Simpsons. Also, we've booked the Neighbours night and are looking forward to an all star cast of Toadfish, Karl Kennedy, Alf from home and away (not technically from Neighbours but i'm going to allow it on the grounds of brilliance...) and, if the rumour mill is to be believed, Harold Bishop!!

Going back to the flat in a bit, it's quite the Lad pad, with it's own unique smell and small maggot problem.... I think of it as character...

Speak soon!

Anyway, I've got te photo's now and have sent a few of them to Jamie for De-bigulation.

Wow. Got to the Blue montains at about 7, just in time for the sunest over the three sisters and the valley at echo point. Really, really breathtaking, it's known as "Australia's grand canyon" and is equally impressive, only with the added visual bonus of acres upon acres of lush rainforest all over the valley floor!



That, and the sight of Cockatoos flying across the valley and the sound of Kookaburras "Laughing" in a distinctly exotic way made the whole thing a really amazing experience.



Next day, Bren and I walked to echo point again to see it in the daytime, and found it just as beautiful.



We went on a walk around the rim to see Katoomba falls and the Katoomba cascades, which were really quite small in comparison to the valey itself, but to be fair, they did have a lot to compete with! We got back to the car and set off for Sydney, with the rather awesome "What is love?" by Haddaway to speed us along in our journey. Haddaway for London Mayor!!

Got into Coogee (the placed where Bren's friends are staying) called them to get their address and spent about 5 minutes driving round in circles before discovering that we were right outside their road at the start. D'oh! We upacked our stuff, went to the offie and bought them a crate of VB for their kindness and a crate of Carlton cold for ourselves. We spent the rest of the night playing X-box, watching various housemembers getting their heads shaved and drinking beers, before Bren passed out on the sofa and I retired to Arlene's vacant (if incrediably soft) bed.

Just to note, coco the monkey is SO much cooler here than he is in the UK, and makes eating coco pops even more enjoyable than it is already! Also, there is a street in Melbourne called batman street, which I had to photograph Bren in front of.

In Canberra still, have just got back from our sighseeing tour, which was really quite nice. canberra is a rather beautiful place, with a huge artificial lake in the centre and over 12 million trees that have been planted since it's creation as the nation's capital. We went to Parliament house, which is a rather impressive building, with a roof covered in perfectly manicured turf to blend in with the green hills of the surroundings. It's rather nice inside too, bren and I went into the Senate and the house of reresentatives, ending up in the great hall, which was really grandiose, but a little plain architecturally.



We then went past the old parliament house and into the National gallery of Australia which is a fantastically ugly building housing some fantastically beautiful artwork. We walked back over commonwealth bridge to see the Captain Cook memorial water jet, which shoots a column of water weighing 6 tonnes 147 metres in the air, somewhat in juxtaposition to the "Conserve our precious water, keep showers to a minimum" signs in the bathrooms. Strange country!

Have got the photographs on CD now, but this internet cafe doesn't allow uploading onto their machines (Can't access the CD drive) so it'll have to wait until Sydney, as we're off to the blue mountains for a spot of camping, so won't have acces to the internet. can't wait though, as the scenery is going to be breathtaking!

Bye for now, but i'll be back with Photo's!

Bye bye melbourne! Ended up going to see the last samurai with Tom Cruise, one of the best films i've seen in ages and well worth a look if you happen to be near a cinema with 2 hours and 23 minutes to invest. Especially if samurai swordplay and porcelain-pretty Japanese women are your thing. Didn't get to say goodbye to Partying Dave and Jim as they were up and at work before we'd quite woken up. Shame as i'd have like to say bye in person, and am going to miss "good conversation", cracking jokes and a shared love of all things beer.

Bren and I drove to Canberra today, "The nations capital", getting here just after 6, just in time for Seinfeld and just in time to catch ANOTHER brutal apocalyptic storm. This country doesn't mess about when it does weather! The hostel we're staying in is REALLY nice and only 22 dollars a night. It has a pool, spa and even a gym, and the piece de resistance, TV's in every room!

Going to the Capitol building tomorrow to do a scenic walk, then on to the Australian museum and Gallery, then on to the Captain Cook memorial and information. Once we've done that little lot i'm getting our photo's burnt onto CD so I can add them to the blog, how exciting is that? If it does work, y'all have to give a shout out to my homie in Hoddesdon, Jamie Bolden. I love you man... Going to the Blue mountains in the afternoon, which is a beautiful mountain range 100KM West of Sydney to do a bit of bushwalking and waterfall hunting, then on to Sydney for the 23rd.

After that and all manner of parking fine tomfoolery, we're going to call the rental company to see if they'll reimburse us if we bring the car back a few days early. That, coupled with the fact that Bren's rather excellent mates in Sydney have said we can stay on their floor, means that we should save quite a bit of cash in the next few days.

That's about it at the moment, all that remains to say is that Melbourne is my favourite Oz city so far, and if i'm going to return on a semi-permenant/pemenant basis, I've found my second home.

The neighbours tour was pretty cool, obviously we were feeling a little fragile, but the very pretty and infinitely chirpy Chex (I thought it was a breakfast cereal) livened us up nicely to the point where all thoughts of vomiting were just a distant memory. We got to see Ramsay street, the studios and Erinsborough high, and also some inside gossip, including thet Harold is going to have a stroke, recover and become a womanising alcoholic! Top stuff!



We got dropped off at the car at around half 4, drove back to the hostel and sat, exhausted, with me staring into the middle distance somewhere and Bren resting his head on the steering wheel. With my last ounce of strength I clipped Bren round the back of the head, causing him to beep the horn with his face, leading to both of us sitting there, silently shaking with floods of tears streaming down our faces. One of the funniest things i've ever done.

Probably going to stay in tonight, as Dave, one of Brens friends from Footprints in Sydney, is at drink driving education school tonight...

Bren's odyssey bren had managed to get himself thrown out. I don't know why, he doesn't know why. After spending about half an hour trying to reason with the "Andre the giant style" bouncer, he stumbled off into the night in a random direction. Somewhere along the line he fell down (cut on his hand) and somewhere along the line, he fell asleep in a doorway, which is really quite brilliant. He was shaken awake some hours later by a hobo, probably asking him to get out of his "house", but he managed to not have a clue where he was (we figured out he'd walked about a mile the wrong way) and stagger around to the nearest station and catch a train to the station near here, and promptly leapt the barrier at the other end, arriving in bed at about 7AM. Priceless.

I don't think there is a moral to this story, but, if there was, it would be something to do with drinking.

3 dollar pints. Sounds like a great idea, doesn't it? Pugg Mahones in central Melbourne was the venue, with JIm, Dave, Bren, Ash (new guy) a random Dutchman and myself in attendance. We found a nice little table in the corner with two charming Australian girls (Sarah and someone, i'm awful with names!) fresh from seeing the Tennis and dressed in complimentary green and gold tops with one green and one gold earring on apiece. Lookied pretty strange in a non tennis environment. We sat drinking, discussing travels and what have you, but then we got on to the subject of sport, which is one close to every Australian's heart! dave was having a particularly good conversation with Sarah and it looked like they were getting on famously! Sadly, all good things have to come to an end, and they left to get a train back to wherever they were from. Also, the Dutch guy had left after having consumed a single glass of coke. the deadline for 3 dollar pints was 11, so at 5 to, we did what any money conscious travellers would do, and we bought a shedload of beers on the cheap. After drinking these, we decided that it would be a good idea to get out of the corner and mingle, so we went upstairs and met a clutch of lovely Ozzie girls and proceeded to get chatting. This was when things got a bit messy...

we were all happily chatting away to various girls when, as they had to be up for work the next day, Dave and Jim said their goodbyes and swayed homewards. It was about this time that I realised that Bren was nowhere to be found, so I Turned to the lovely Olivia, (who was a good couple of inches taller than me!) and said "I'll be back in a minute, I just have to look for my friend..." Spent an indeterminate amount of time swaying around looking for Bren, failed to find him, and promptly left to look for him outside. Massive schoolboy error as Olivia was, by all accounts, really quite stunning. Idiot.

After a bit of wandering round the street, i realised that it was highly unlikely that I would find Bren in this state, but also that I was hopelessly lost. This is where things go totally blank, but I found myself in a cab being driven aimlessly round Melbourne, before i managed to recognise somewhere and guide the Cabbie in. A small side note, no one in Melbourne has any clue as to the existance opf our hostel. None of the poeple we asked knew where it was, none of the people who LIVE in Melbourne know where it is. Makes it quite difficult to find. Anyway, I got back, got into the hostel somehow (there's a code on the door that I don't know, so god knows how I did!) and slumped into bed.

I woke up with a start at 7.59 remembering that I had no clue where Bren was. I raised my head and looked down to find myself covered in blood. It turns out that during my sleep i managed to spasm and slam my face into the railings round my bed, causing my nose to promptly start bleeding. Looked over and, sure enough, there was Bren, tucked away in bed. How he got there though, is a much more interesting story...

Had a fairly quiet night in the end, played a bit of pool, watched some cricket with Dave and jim, then hit the hay after a couple of pints and the first half an hour of "Magnum force". I also discovered the Playboy pinball machine, which whispers a variety of sweet nothings when you press the flippers. My personal favourite was "Mmmm, I like strapping men..." I'm sure you do, but you're a pinball machine. It'd never work...

Unfortunately woken up at about 3AM by a friend of one of the people in our room, who swayed in, turned on the light and demanded condoms from the men in the room. What a charmer! As a result I felt a bit groggy this morning for the 7:30 tennis wakeup call, as I'd only got 3 hours sleep...

We had a nice hearty breakfast and made some sandwiches for the day, and set off by about 8. The tennis itself was really cool, the tickets we had entitled us to a free tram there and back, which was a nice airconditioned luxury! We made our way to the Vodafone arena and watched Dementieva Vs Jelena Jankovic, which was a rather entertaining short-skirted gruntfest, with the unseeded Jankovic beating Dementiova in 2 sets, quite the upset! next up was an epic slog between thwe Brazilian Gustavo Kurtein Vs Dutch John Van Someone.



The dutch contingent were pretty vocal actually, dressed head to toe in bright orange togas, but they couldn't compete with the hyper-excitable Brazillians, who shouted, cheered and bounced their man to victory in a bemusing 6-7, 6-0, 6-1, 2-6, 8-6 cliffhanger, which ended when the Dutchman got crippling cramp and fell to the floor twice! He got up again and, through obvious pain, served practically underarm to eventually lose after a truly heartwarming performance. Last and by all means least was the utter annihilation of 15 year old C.Chaung by Mauresmo, the French number 4 seed 6-1, 6-0. Sadly, Carlos Moyet, playing in the fourth and final match, had injured himself in practice, so we didn't get to see the last game, but all in all, a brilliant day out! We wandered around the other courts and caught a fleeting Glimpse of Lindsey Davenport's arm pummelling her unfortunate opponent into the court. We went home, satisfied, and i'm looking forward to cooking and then eating something other than sandwiches...

Going out tonight to a cheap bar in Melbourne, gladly we only have to be at the pick up for the Neighbours tour by 1:20, so we can get a lie in. Hopefully, the Irish will behave theselves tonight, but their track record isn't doing them any favours!

Prove me wrong. Please.

Rather annoyingly, I hadn't checked my Orange email account for a few days, as i'm using my hotmail as my main account at the moment. It turns out that Kane, one of the cool ozzie guys I used to work with, lives in Mount Gambier! Thanks for the heads up Em, but i'm clearly an idiot.

Also, we didn't end up going to "Witches in Britches" as, on closer inspection, the witches are absolutely terrifying...

Greetings from bracing/boiling Melbourne! The weather here goes from Arctic blast to scorching heat quicker than you can roll up the sleeves of your jumper! Booked into the YHA on Queensbury street, which was clearly too swanky for us, and then checked emails to find that Jim and Partying Dave were staying in a hostel in Melbourne too! Met up with them in McMahons, which took us an absolute age to find as we went the wrong way down Stewert street and ended up in central Melbourne! Rather brilliantly, though, we did find a road called "Batman street", and an all male revue bar called "Les Girls". Wonder how many drunken men looking for entertainment THAT's caught out... Once we got there we caught up and talked about the crazy crap we'd all been doing since last we saw each other! Also, we discovered that their hostel was a good 10 dollars a night cheaper than our one, so I approached the hyper-friendly barman who was more than happy to book us in for the next three nights, saving us 30 dollars. Splendid! We ended up going to a pub showing the football, Man UTD Vs Wolves (unlucky Kieran!!) and Spurs v Liverpool. We had a few beers, met the locals and sprinted home at half time (it was about 3 AM and we had to check out of our hostel early. That and it was F*cking freezing!)

Spent this morning walking along the river watching people rowing, walking their dogs and generally enjoying their Sunday persuits. Saw some of the sights, including the brilliantly styled Town square (it's got the most jaunty angles and glass craziness i've ever seen) and went to the Rod Laver Stadium and booked tickets for the first day of the Australian open on Monday, which is pretty cool. we came back to the hostel, ate a bit of lunch then got Jim, Dave and a random German and went to play some football, which was quite brilliant, but also quite exhausting!

We're booking the Neighbours tour tonight, that's on Tuesday, then we're going to pop to the cinema (Cinema on "Tight-arse Tuesday is cheap here, for some reason...) to see the last Samurai. Off on Wednesday to Canberra, which should be quite pretty, but ultimately quite dull. Well, we couldn't go to Australia and not see the capitol, could we!

Got up nice and early today (bloody time zones make that quite the challenge!) and started along the Great ocean road, which has some great, erm, ocean road, and some awesome craggy limestone scenery. We stopped at London Bridge, a collapsed stone arch, pausing to take a photo in what I can only describe as a persistant force 9 gale. Bren said that the sight of me "Taking a battering for the cause" was a photo in itself. shame we don't have two working cameras, isn't it Fuji?...

The 12 Apostles (12 limestone stacks) were cool, as was the Grotto, a secluded limestone arch. My favourite was Loch Ard Gorge, where sadly 53 people lost their lives in a shipwreck, on the fabled "Shipwreck (South) coast" of Australia. It was quite hard to believe looking out over the ocean, that there was nothing but sea separating us from Antarctica. Until the wind blew, of course...



The road itself was amazing, going from the best scenic road to the best driving road in the blink of an eye, from craggy cliffs to rainforest and back again. I must say that I really REALLY missed my bike today. I was even going through the corners figuring out what line i'd take, when i'd brake (see God, then brake...) and even what gear i'd be in. Sad, i know, but it kept ME amused!

We're in the hyperswanky(TM) YHA in Melbourne at the moment, which is pretty nice. The best eating/drinking establishment i've seen so far was called "Witches in Britches" and featured dinner theatre. Got to be worth a shot, surely?

Oh, and on a slightly crappy note, Chrissy the lovely German girl from Fraser Island won't be here until the 23rd. Scheise.

The coolest thing was that it had been raining just before we got there, and the heat of the sun was evaporating the rain into a perpetual mist that shrouded the road. It looked really cool.

The drive is on! Drove the forst half of the coastal road to Melbourne today, Really pretty scenery of rolling farmland and hills as far as the eye could see on the left hand side, and a ridge over which was the sea on the other. Quite frustrating! Finest moment of the drive was seeing a jet black horse running in a field, just because it could! Stopped off at a place called Maria Creek for lunch, which was nice but a bit windy, then on to Mount Gambier, which has a place called "Blue Lake". In keeping with the Aussie "Call a spade a spade" philosophy, it was indeed the bluest lake i've ever seen, with a kind of irridescent blue glow to it. Quite breathtaking actually, and totally unexpected.




The same was true of the hostel in Warnambool, actually. Picked at random, it turned out to be absoutely lovely, with a 50inch TV with surround sound! Bren and I went shopping, and came back with 4 burgers, six sausages and various buns and rolls from the reduced counter. What followed was simply an obscene meat-fest, with Bren and I immobilised by two burgers and hotdogs each. We then waddled over to the TV, sat down and watched "About Schmidt" which was, I'm shocked to say, shit.

Unfortunately, we had to share a room with the world snoring champion, but i managed to get a good nights sleep using my magical earplugs. God bless perforated eardrums!

Oh yeah, before I forget! Highlight of the hostel in Adelaide: Eating Apple pie and cream to the tune of Smooth Criminal. Cool as hell and twice as tasty!

Last day in Adelaide! The hostel, although brilliant from a technical standpoint, is a little "Sterile" as it's so big, so Bren and I will be glad to get on the road. Yesterday was quite cool, saw Return of the King again (had a tear in my eye during the cavalry charge at Minas Tirith... Sad I know!) Went shopping and got the most ridiculously happy response to simply saying "bless you" to the apallingly attractive checkout girl. Maybe she's never been blessed?

Watched Ice age and The fast and the furious on DVD, then had a few beers with Bren (snuck in from the car for maximum cheapness) then to bed.

We're driving the "Great ocean road" over the next few days, which is supposed to be better than Big Sur for scenery, really can't wait!

Next stop, some cosy coastal town, hooray!

The sea! Oh god, the sea... After a couple of weeks of desert it makes a refreshing change to see the coast once more. Drove from Port Augusta to Adelaide quite late on in the day, cruising through miles of cornfields to the strains f elvies Presley! Adelaide is really cool, perhaps i'm biased as it's the first proper city we've been in since Brisbane, but it's definitely at or near the top of my favourite Ozzie cities list! For a start, there are no less than THREE Ducati dealerships in the city that we've driven past, and about 10 branches of Subway, my new favourite food (It's good for you I tell you!) the hostel is nice, cheap internet, clean rooms and lots of common areas for socialising, but the best bit by a mile is free apple pie and cream between 8 and 9 PM. Just the thing to deal with the dead zone between the 7-8 and 9-10 happy hours... Got a wee bit tipsy last night, put the world to rights and had a sound nights sleep. Not in a tent, not in a cave or in a hippy den. Just a nice, comfortable city-based bed. Bliss.



Played football in Ellis park for about half an hour today, which was quite fun (perfect grass!) Going to the Adelaide museum today and the art gallery, then probably to the cinema. Sadly our budget has been smashed a bit today by a 15 dollar parking ticket, which sucks.

Oh well, the boot's still full of beer....

"Are you lonesome tonight?"

Chris

Got up and had a hearty Frosties and toast breakfast and chatted with the Israeli girls and Jerry for a few hours. I really enjoyed staying there actually, so it was quite a shame to go. Went to the chemists to get some Eye medicine (I now have an eye infection as well...) and then went to the library for some saucy free internet access (we're there now...) Heading off to Adelaide for 2 days then on to Melbourne for 4 or 5 to meet up with Chrissy and to go drinking with the cast of Neighbours. Seriously.

Can't wait.

Well, now that i've slept in a cave, I know how Batman must feel (technically though he didn't actually SLEEP in a cave, he slept upstairs in his mansion, but i'm sure that there were times when he'd come in from a hard night's batmanning thinking "Sod it, I can't be arsed with all those stairs, i'm just going to fall asleep here, in the batmobile...") Went to the cave shower block to find Bren conversing with a Jaw-droppingly gorgeous Italian girl (she had pigtails for the love of god....) and showered, fresh for our day of driving in Southern Australia. Now, the Northern territory is pretty bleak, but SA has it thoroughly licked...

We drove through a place called the "Woomera prohibited area" which the British dropped seven atomic bombs on in the 50's. Quite worrying, and one of the few places in Australi where a lead apron would be suitable attire. Instead of dirt covered with a few gum trees here and there and a layer of gound vegetation, it has expanses of red earth broken up by large red sand dunes (which look so cool...) dotted with tiny grassy shrubs as far as the eye can see (and probably beyond.) this was broken up slightly by endless white salt flats which look bizzarely like frozen lakes. Very weird in an endless expanse of semidesert... We also saw a small tornado whirling away to the right of the road, which was pretty cool. We got to a place called Port Augusta by about 4:30 and proceeded to the cheapest accomodation in the lonely planet, which proved to be rather brilliantly characterful.

We were greeted by the owner, Jerry, and were told that we could stay for 11 dollars a night if we helped out with chores in the garden and tidied up our rooms. So, we helped him load up a trailer for the local dump, clear away a vast expanse of tiles (all the time looking for spiders in the rubbish heap) and just generally lent a hand. The other guests staying there were two charming Israeli girls, one of whom had decorated the bathroom with some rather flattering "body prints" using a few tins of paint and no brush. Quite how she got them so high uop the wall remains a complete mystery to me! "The longest shower of my life" indeed...

We went out, bought steak (for a change) and a crate of carlton Cold's, gort back and watched the Big Lebowski, loads of fun. Ended the night watching the finale of Temptation Island, during which I managed to guess 100% accurately who was getting ditched and who was getting hitched. Splendid.

The drive from Yulara (Ayers Rock resort) to Coober Pedy (Tiny mining town, where we are now) was really quite uneventful. the scenery had become more and more desolate, and we saw the craziest thing we've seen so far. About 150KM from the nearest town were two cyclists attached to each other, with slightly amusing road train replica signs on their backs saying "Cycle train". I really would be amazed if they were still alive now.. Anyway, we decided to go to Coober Pedy so we could strike for Adelaide on Tuesday, meaning I can get cheap Cinema... Coober Pedy was announced by about 35KM's of mining heaps, as far as the eye can see. As far as the weather is concerned, let me just say this. I saw an amusing roadside sign saying "Warning: Cattle keeping it real" which as you can understand is rather funny, and so Bren stopped so we could take a photo. I got out, and, I can honsetly say, I felt like I was in a fan assisted oven. the sun was beating down, and the wind was actually unbearably hot on my exposed areas.

In fact, it's so hot here that i'm typing this from our hostel which is UNDERGROUND, how cool is that? It "soars to over 50" here, so most of the buildings are underground, just so people can survive.

Hard bastards.

The falls that never were: This is a little out of sequence but I've just remembered about it so in it goes. On the way to Litchfield national park, there are two distinct routes, one being the direct highway route, and the other being the more indirect, "winding, poorly surfaced, narrow, scenic-often-flooded "Tourists route" Unsurprisingly, we decided to take the scenic route, as we had a bit of time to spare. Along the way i noticed a marker on the OS map for a place called, Robin falls. "That sounds nice, shall we go there?" I thought, and possibly said to Bren. We found the sign for it, stopped at the mouth of the (obviously dirt) road and decided to walk, knowing that Jeff can't really handle the rough stuff.

We walked. And walked. We forded a creek, we walked, until we came to a Nissan patrol at the side of the road, and the end of the track. No waterfall. Nothing. Now, I really do expect some reward at the end of a walk, and the fact that we forded a goddamn CREEK should have entitled us to something. Surely...

This annoyed me immensely, and I was quite glad that we hadn't come all the way out here just to see it, as I had suggested we do the next day. The moral of the story is, don't believe a place is nice, just because it has a nice name. Or even that it exists.

Hi again. Sorry to leave you hanging like that but i just had to get out of the moth-ridden expense hole that was that internet cafe. Well, owing to the immense frustration that the flies had caused on the two walks earlier that day, we decided that we would drive round Uluru instead of walking it. I had originally planned to climb it, but it's against the religion of the Aborigines, so in the interests of international relations, I left well enough alone. Interesting side not, the walk at Kata Tjuta is 7.4 Kilometres of gruelling rocky terrain (apart from the valley itself) and is termed as "challenging" by the rangers. On the day we did it, it was 35 degrees, and, i am now informed, they close the walk at 36 degrees due to "safety reasons". No wonder it was so damn tough!

Aaaanyway, back to Uluru. Nothing I do to describe it will really do it justice. Yes it's true, it's just a really, really big rock, but it really is something special. Just driving round it left me speechless at the sheer size and oddity of the thing, with only a few words exchanged between Bren and I during the drive (and not a bit of MJ to be heard...). It's 1KM wide and 3.6KM long so that's quite a long time to be in awe of somthing. We drove to the sunset viewing area and I just stood, watching it as it changed from brown to yellow, to orange, then red and then charcoal.





It really was an amazing sight (even more amazing than the guy next to us's girlfriend...). We drove back to the campsite and had a look at how much the BBQ was going to be (we decided that no matter how much it was we were going to have it, as we had "Buy one get one half price" vouchers) and were staggered to note that burgers were, wait for it, 25 dollars. Each.

Annoyed, we went to the supermarket, bought 8 sausages for 4 dollars and had 4 barbecued hotdogs each, which were rather lovely. One thing of note was that when I popped to the toilet, I went into the cubicle, as you do, sat down, as you do and then looked down, only to find that I was sharing the cubicle with a snake. Fortunately, I didn't bother him, and he didn't bother me, and that was that. We both hit the showers, having been rendered qute aromatic by the 16KM's walked, and then went to bed.

Greetings from the red centre! We got up a freakish o clock again this morning and drove to kings canyon. We decided to do the longest walk around the rim, taking in the "Garden of Eden" and the waterfall in the centre. Well, I'm probably a bit spoilt after the grand canyon, but it wasn't really much of a spectacle. The walk was at a 70 degree incline at times, so the challengewas well worth it, but the garden of Eden was about 20 trees and a brook, admittedly in the middle of the desert, and as the area hasn't had much rain recently, the waterfall was dry. We got back to the car, and commenced the next part of our plan, arriving at the campsite at Uluru-Kata Tjutu national park, and driving on to kata Tjutu, a range of massive monoliths in the Simpson desert. Once again, we decided to do the longest walk, which was the "Valley of the winds" and by this time it was about 35 degrees. To sum it up, it was the hardest damn walk of my life, made almost unbearable by the bloody Australian flies that just won't leave you alone!! At one point, I looked up to the heavens and uttered a profanity so loud that it echoed and rebounded off the canyon walls, which I was most pleased with given my state of mind at the time! It was all worth it when we finally got to the valley and were confronted by beautiful green trees and an amazingly refreshing breeze,simply breathtaking, and well worthy of the slightly poetic name.



Got back in the car and drove back to the campsite, set up our tent and headed off to Uluru (Ayers rock) which I'll tell you about when I go to a less expensive internet cafe...

We got up pretty early to go to the desert park, paid Bren's speeding fine (the nice policemen in Townsville tld us we could pay at the post office). The desert park was pretty cool, with an excellent demonstration of birds of prey including a super-fast hobby, a really elegant Kite and an eagle with a wingspan to worry air traffic control... This, coupled with an informative film and of course, the happily named Death Adder, meant th whole thing was a resounding success. that, and getting in as students on expired NUS cards. Well, you do have to try these things, don't you.

We hit the road for Kings canyon at about 12. The roads in central are so desolate that any cars passing the other way wave enthusiastically at you, overjoyed to see another human being alive on this stretch of road. I can just imagine the scene: "Oh my god, another person, alive.... I thought I was in some kind of Stephen King movie where the whole population of the earth had suddenly died.." It was at this level of desolation, with the northern territory providing a proper outback nothingness, that I got the tape player to work again (it had broken about a week ago...) and "Just good friends" by michael jackson came blaring out, to the instant delight of Bren and I.

We got to the campground at about 6, to be greeted by a rather fine looking lady in an acubra who showed us our camp site whilst riding a quad, standing up periodically to give us the best view we'd had all day... We were too late to see the canyon, but early enough for me to enjoy the sunset whilst reading my book on the roof of the car. bren and I laid on the bonnet of Jeff and watched the stars, and finally went to bed for another restless nights sleep. Fortunately though, unlike Litchfield, being in the middle of the desert meant that it was pleasantly cool during the night. I lay there, drifting off to sleep with only the sound of bats hunting insects with ultrasound (so cool!) and desert crickets for company. That and Bren's occasional snoring...

We woke up bright and early (just before 10..) and had a nutritious breakfast of Coco pos and toast. Got on the road to Alice springs and drove down the Stuart Highway, stopping only to admire the Devils marbles along the way, being constantly harassed by flies for the privilage. The Devils marbles are massive 30ft high boulders which were left on place when the soft soil arund them eroded away over time. The Aborigines would have you believe that they are eggs laid by the Rainbow Serpent at the beginning of the earth. If you ask me, the Aborigines definitely had one too many "Jazz Cigarettes" when they were writing the history of the country, but that's just one mans opinion...

We watched the scenery turn from Green to Brown and finally to Red (Jamie, you'd absolutely LOVE the soil round here!) Got into Alice at about 4, checked into a hostel that's 12 dollars a night! We're going to the Alice Springs desert park tomorrow, then on to Kings Canyon for a spot of Camping. I promise i'll only talk to her Tom... After that, we're off to Uluru (Ayers Rock) and Kata Tjuta (the olgas) for a spot of monolith watching. I'm off to watch the sunset from Anzac hill, or watch Seinfeld. Whichever's easiest...

Chris

The next morning we woke up with the sun (which obviously woke the larks up too, or whatever the hell those birds were making that godawful racket) We decided that, as it was 7AM we could make it all the way to Tennant Creek if we left right then. No messing. We decided this for two reasons:

1. Katherine's gorge was far too wet for us to access, and if we had gone there we'd have got incredibly dirty.

2. I planned to swim in the pluge pool of Florence falls but, given that being bitten in half by a crocodile wasn't really my cup of tea, decided to leave well enough alone.

3. Baldo and Bumface were still in Katherine.

Ok, I know that's 3, but that last one just occured to me. In fact, we narrowly avoided giving bumface a lift to Litchfield. Never have I been so glad that Jeff was only just big enough for two people and luggage.

Anyway, we managed to drive more than the length of England over dirt tracks, dodging (most) birds and skirting round the edge of rather violent looking storm systems. Note: We now have a system for reducing bird casualties. After "De-animating" two more birds, Bren or myself now slam the horn as much as we can whenever we see a bird in the middle of the road. Quite the conservationists eh? When we did get to Tennant Creek, we were pleased to note that Stickie was still there (I had a rather fetching piece of twig that would have made him a great girlfriend!) and that Porterhouse steak was still incrediably cheap in the shop down the road. We ate like kings, went to the outback pub (don't know the name of it) for a lock in and played some pool, retiring at a respectible 10PM...

Hi again! The stay in Katherine ended up being quite eventful. It's cyclone season here and, sure enough, it was about time for another storm, with this one absolutely surrounding the town and providing the best light show i've ever seen! Bren and I decided to go out for a closer look away from the street lights, but were intercepted by a rather drunken aboriginal lady, and so walked back to our hostel to get the car. Cowards? She was terrifying! Anyway, we went storm chasing and got some cool pictures before the storm actually hit, which it did with gusto! Spent the rest of the night watching TV and talking to Bumface and Baldo, our two roommates who, whilst nice enough, were fantastically dull and dim respectively.

Next day was a pancake breakfast, followed by a fairly long drive (700KM) up to Litchfield national park. the usual obstacles of dirt roads where highways should be (it said highway on the map, go figure!) cattle on the road, road trains and, a first for us, bounding kangaroos littered the journey. This time, however, we had the bonus of the scenery going from green scrubland into lush green rainforests! Now I don't know about you, but I was lead to believe that Australia was arid. Shows that those people who write books don't know everything...


Got to Litchfield at about 4 and watched in awe as the termite mounds went from bungalow to skyscraper. One of them was so ridiculous that Bren and i simply had to stop the car and take a picture: It was at least 15ft high!


Next stop was the magnetic termite mounds, which look like headstones as the termites build the long faces to catch the heat of the sun. Next we went on to the meat and potatoes of Litchfield, the waterfalls. The first falls we saw were the Wangi falls, which were simply awesome as the wet season rains had swelled them to huge proportions.



Unfortunately it meant we couldn't go for a swim in the plunge pool as there were saltwater crocodiles about (now THAT's a warning sign!). We stood there for a while taking in the gorgeous rainforest scenery, then decided to have a look around. We took a walk to the top of the falls, stopping only to admire two golden orb web spiders the sizeof my hand. They actually spin golden webs which look really cool in the sunlight. When we finally did get to the top we were treated to a breathtaking view of rainforest as far as the eye could see, and the sight of the river plunging over the edge into the void.

Next stop was Tolmer falls, which featured more gorgeous scenery, flanked thistime by vivid red cliffs carved from the side of the tabletop mountains. We drove back to Florence falls, our campground for the night, and went to see the falls themselves. They were really quite lovely twin waterfalls, sadly lessened by Wangi falls (also a twin waterfall) but nonetheless quite beautiful.

We struck up camp, collected firewood and had a well needed shower, although by the time I had mine it was pitch black, making effective cleaning quite difficult. I got a fire going (told you scouts would come in handy one day) and Bren and I sat around talking until the sun went down and the ridiculously bright moon came up (it was seriously like someone getting on top of a stepladder and shining a torch in your face all night. Annoying eh?) managed to pile my right eye socket into a rock jutting out under the groundsheet, and proceeded to get the most restless nights sleep i've ever had. I did, however, have a dream about Tom Perry's mum, whom i've never actually met (I didn't touch her Tom, I swear!)

Tenant creek. Well, all I can say about the hostel is that we were greatly outnumbered inside by insects, including stickie the stick insect, who was actually quite cool. It was about that time that we noticed the sky darken, then become pitch black. The storm that we had passed on the highway proceeded to rip through the little "town" (population 8000) bending the palm trees horzintal, blinding us with flashes of lightening and producing cracks of thunder so loud that it sounded as if the sky was ripping apart! All of this accompanied by near horizontal rain bringing visibility down to about 10 feet! After quite a while, the storm passed, and I went to make a phonecall. The storm had been so severe that it knocked out all the phones (and TV!!) in the area. Sorry Mum and Dad, I did try to call!!

The next day, we got up pretty early and started off for Katherine, 300KM south of Litchfield national Park. The first thing of note I saw was a tree that had been split in two by lightening, how cool is that? We carried on straight down the Stuart highway, turning only to avoind the 5ft long lizard ambling across the road... This lizard was then bettered by a tiny lizard that ran across the road so fast that his front legs didn't even touch the ground! Seeing it run was so amusing that it deserved to survive just for the entertainment value. Run Lizard, run!

We stopped off for lunch in a cool outback pub in a place called Daly Waters, the access road to which was flooded! The standing population must have been in the low double figures, but it was the coolest pub i've been to in a long time, with all sorts of crazy crap on the walls! In Katherine at the moment, heading off to Litchfield national park for some scenery and camping exploits.

God damn, air conditioning is good!

A few things have happened to Outback Bren(TM) and Outback Chris(TM) since last I blogged. First of all, we've bought a spacious 2 man tent, from a man who also had the best red pimp-style acubra (australian hat) i've ever seen, complete with red feather!

Driving from Cairns to charters towers, we encountered the first unsealed road (dirt track) on a diversion through the centre of Oz. Quite an experience as we were told to put high beams on (in the middle of the day) and be aware that there was a savere dust problem. I'm not joking when I say visibility was down to about 6 feet, on an australian B road!

On the drive from Charters towers (middle of nowhere) to Mount Isa (middle of nowhere) we managed to come across a huge plume of black smoke: our first bush fire! We slowed down and tried to call the bush ranger's station but had no reception, unsurprising, given that we were in the middle of nowhere!



Once we got to Mount Isa, we settled in, greeted again by a cat, this time called Kathy. We went to a vista point and watched the sunset, which was absolutely awesome due to the storm clouds on either side, producing the largest rainbow i've ever seen, and some cool reflections of the sun off the raindrops.



Our first warning that it was going to rain was from hearing the raindrops hitting the buildings about half a mile away. We turned, started walking, then running only to get absolutely soaked anyway by fist sized drops of rain!



The next morning we woke up late, after having been kept up by 3 drunken Irishmen in the pool at 4AM. I had had a word with them but I don't think they were going to be quiet for anyone! Anyway, we got on our way just before 10, and were quite pleased with the progress we were making, until sudenly, almost 2 thirds of the road dissappeared. We were going down what I can only describe as a ribbon of tarmac, just wide enough for Jeff, . To make matters worse, the road featured come charming blind crests, and you've guessed it, 150ft road trains, with closing speeds approaching 200KM/H. Now these are a bit hairy on normal roads, but with only one lane to play with, Bren was forced to offroad as three of them hurtled past us with about 3 feet to spare! A quality picture indeed!



Fortunately, the roads got better after about 10km and we were able to get a fairly decent pace up until we got to a petrol station and filled up. The next sign we saw, concerningly, said "No petrol for 478KM". We weren't too concerned by this, as we were confident that Jeff could do 550 KM to the tank. The next sign was slightly more concerning, about 20KM down the road, saying "Headwinds increase fuel consumption". Now, when a sign warns you of something in Australia, man, you'd better take note! We pushed on regardless, confident that Jeff could handle it. Unfortunately, Jeff's petrol gauge had other ideas. At just under half empty, it performed a spectacular England cricket team style batting collapse and started heading south alarmingly. Bren and I turned off the airconditioning, then the fan in a desperate attempt to save fuel, making the car so unbearably hot that we both had to cease movement to avoid instant sweat. The one thing that went through my mind as we sweated our way along the highway was just how hard the original explorers had to be to endure this day after day. I tip my bonnet to you! The gauge got to empty, then below empty, seeming to stay there for an age when suddenly.....



A sign loomed into view saying "Shell station, 3KM' We were saved, we'd even planned how long we could survive for, how much better our chances would be on the Stuart highway, all sorts of things. All i can say is god bless shell!

We completed the rest of the journey at a decent pace. It was so hot at this point that the heat haze made the road look like an ever-receding river being chased by an ever-advancing highway, very cool indeed! Looking to our left we managed to catch the leading edge of a rather nasty looking storm rolling over the scrub, occasionally striking at the ground with fingers of lightening. More on that later!

Aside: Just remembered an amusing sign I saw for a pub in New South Wales:

"Liquor in the front, poker in the back".

Brings the tone down slightly but it made ME laugh...

Chris

It begins. The seemingly ridiculous drive in a car not designed for distance has begun. First drive was from Cairns to Charters towers, a rather, well, empty ex-mining town about 200KM inland. Population 1800, of which there was not a soul about when we arrived, leading to a weird, Stephen King aura to the place. We stayed ina quaint restored 18th Century bunkhouse, where we were greeted by Morris the rather brilliant greeting Cat. made dinner (a rather excellent 3.50 steak each) and sat watching TV for a bit, pausing only to construct a makeshift remote control out of the clothes rail in the cupboard...

Left bright and early (with no coco-pops due to some nasty bugger stealing our milk!) and proceeded to drive a rather monsterous 800KM inland. The outback initially proved as desolate as we had been lead to believe, with absolutely nothing but sand and heat haze as far as the eye could see. The only thing breaking up the monotony was the occasional 50 Metre road train, bringing with it a Jeff-battering maelstom of sand and stones, making for quite the moments of panic!

After driving through/with a couple of herds of cows and sadly killing a low flying bird (they do insist on flying inches above the road, it was really only a matter of time) the only wildlife we saw for about 100KM was sadly flat and kangaroo shaped (or corpsearoos(TM) All of a sudden, we were surrounded by some of the lushest greenery i've seen outside of England. The rainy season has started and with it comes an amazing array of plants and animals. We made it to Mt Isa at about 5PM, where, rather nicely it's 40 degrees of punishing humidity.

Off to see the sunset over the town at a vista point, then off to an Irish pub for a few for the road.

Cashier lady: Woolworths, Charters Towers, Queensland.

"So, where did you come from today?"

"Cairns, up the coast"

"That's a pretty long drive"

"Yep, we're going to Mount Isa Tomorrow..."

"What?! Are you guys in some kind of Race, or are you just mad....?"

Happy new year! (Belatedly...) have been a real lazybones as regards internet, as the places Bren and I now find ourselfves in have decreasing amounts of civilisation... New years in cairns was really cool! Spent the day looking around shops with a few of the others from the hostel, whilst Bren became a fully PADI certified diver. Congrats Bren! When he did get back, we ate dinner, started drinking the Bundaberg Royal Liquer (all gone now, sob!) and then progressed to the bar. Everyone got nicely toasted, with a fair few drunken pics to show for it, then we all went into town in the minibus.

Most of us ended up in a place called, rather excellently, Paddy's Shenanigans, which featured a rather comely lass in leather chaps and a bikini dancing on the bar. Unfortunately, a succession of fat, y-fronted men were chosen to have some kind of futile "dance off", which comely lass won effortlessly. We then found ourselves outside of SOHO, a dance type venue, where we met up with the rest of the people from the hostel. Lyndsey, rather embarassingly, got ID'd, and it took some pretty fast talking to stop the night from becoming distinctly pants. Once we got inside, we got drinks and found ourselves a spot to watch the fireworks from the esplenade lagoon and started chatting/drinking away. Weren't quite prepared for the countdown, but ten seconds warning is as much as anyone realistically needs, and celebrated new years with a fairly tame fireworks display (I think family Ronketti unleashes more firepower on November 5th...) and a couple of New Years snogs. Also, unbeknownst to me, Misty (from the hostel) was also working at SOHO, and I got a diving hug/kiss combo from over the bar, leaving me pleased as punch!



Unfortunately, as it was actually dance music (and not cheese) it was quite hard to find a willing dance partner. Fortunately, the lovely Hannah obliged, and I managed to have a bit of a boogie before we egressed, drunkenly, at about 3AM. Woke up on new years day at 3PM, watched scary movie 3 and Bruce almighty, adn said my farewells to everyone, as we were due to leave at 8:30 on the 2nd. Pretty sad to go actually, as i've met lots of cool people, but, i'm sure i'll get to meet up with them again in the UK. Lyndsey, Hannah, Millie, it was great meeting you!